Most of us do. Why? Well, admit it or not but it's because we always seek for approval or affirmation from others. Someone also asked me for an advice. Let me describe him first and then I'll tell you about his dilemma.
"The purpose of this paper [the purpose of having one, like any other purpose has, is to prove something - anything that proves everything man ever wanted - approval], as any other nihilist might suppose, is to deny.That's the introduction of his term paper in college before he went AWOL. Yeah, he's got some issues. That kid was 19 years old at that time, a typical weirdo at his age, trying to make sense of everything and trying to figure out what he really wanted in life. He wanted to become like his late father, an engineer who worked overseas. He wanted to follow his footsteps because of all the great things he heard about him from all of the people around him when he's still alive. His father was smart and candid, generous, had a great sense of humor, kind and thoughtful, humble enough to treat poor people the same way as he treats his friends, and even had his fair share of bad habits like smoking, drinking alcohol, girls, and even shabu at some point! His father was also a politician material because of his public relations skills. And most importantly, his father loved his mother more than anything in the world.
"Having been aware of almost every nano-problem of this society, my understanding is supposed to be altered consciously or subconsciously, one way or another when in fact the only thing that I’ve learned is to think about thinking.
Am I supposed to rewrite the most recent studies and own their ideas and/or reject them by providing "Italics"? Or compare them with the "Classics" and search for "Development"? Or exhaust every website of whatever information the virtual world may have? Or be with the real people who have the first-hand experience of the actual problems I am identifying so as to balance my ideas – simply put, load my observations with substance or empirical evidence? Or perhaps just believe of whatever I am capable of and be good at it?
"Then, perhaps I would write!
"As any other spectator would admit, I can only speak of fragmented realities [the subjective ones – with meanings created by human mind by simply believing he can] – half-truths and lies. In spite of this, one thing is certain: to be certain is an escape!"
That's what he wanted to be when he grows up.
However, nothing has been working for him to achieve his goals. At some point, he was trying so hard that it looked very unnatural. He was lost. He realized that he was almost worshiping an idea of a father. It was only an idea because he never met him; he only knew about him through people's stories and shared memories.
He was planning to be an architect but they didn't have enough money to support his passion for planning and drafting. He took the cheapest course in college and chose his major at random. He didn't graduate. He applied for good paying jobs but got rejected because of his grades. He soon took different kinds of jobs that are way below his skills set but got a decent job later on and stayed in that industry. However, he still couldn't seem to stay in one company for more than two years. He always feels like he's not growing in any company that he worked for that's why he's always resigning.
He's been asking me, "What seems to be the problem?" My advice to him was very simple: "You already knew what exactly you want and have to do. You just have to take your time."
That kid is now an adult, it's me. 😅😁
Akala ng marami, kapag tapos ka na magaral, you have it all figured out. Well, apparently not. You still have to talk to yourself about what you really wanted, what your goals are, what's your plan a, plan b, your strategies, backup plan c-z, etc. Even now that I'm in my early 30s, I still talk to myself. The problem with my younger self was, kahit akala n'ya isa na s'yang free thinker, at the back of his mind, he's secretly asking for approval from his illusion of a father.
Lesson #1: KNOW YOUR INNER SELF; FIND YOUR CENTER AND FOLLOW YOUR HEART, NOT OTHER'S OPINION OF WHAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU. Watch this short video because you'll need to think about it later.
Marami sa atin, kuntento na sa buhay nila. Okay naman ang lahat kasi may trabaho tayo, sumasahod kada bwan, may pang-grocery at pambayad sa bills, nabibili ang gusto at ibang luho sa buhay, nakakagala with friends, may konting naiaabot sa family, at may ME-Time every weekend. Pero bakit parang laging may kulang? Kasi nga OKAY LANG ang buhay natin. OKAY is NOT OKAY because it is NOT GREAT!
Madalas natin napapanuod sa mga movies at sa dramarama sa umaga, hapon at primetime 'yung mga eksena ng kontrabidang mayaman, 'pag sa opisina at sa labas, ay parang napakasarap ng buhay, pero paguwi sa kanilang magarang bahay, magisa lang, tulala, umiinom ng mamahaling wine, walang kausap, walang ka-text/chat, walang notification sa facebook kaya umiiyak na lang bigla na parang baliw. In short, walang nagmamahal. 'Yung tipong kahit mamatay na s'ya that very moment, walang makakapansin or worse magdidiwang pa ang mga tao kasi lahat ng kakilala n'ya galit sa kanya dahil sa sama ng ugali n'ya.
OMG! Talking about CLICHE, right? Lols! 😅😁
You know what's more cliche than that? We consider that as entertaining but at the same time, we think that it's a fact, something that's really happening to filthy rich people! If that's true then why do we want to be wealthy?
The reason why my advice to my younger self was: "take your time" because of these kinds of BS, because at some point, I figured that I will get more in life if I just give myself more time to study and learn new things.
Apparently, I also considered those movie scenes in the past as entertaining and as factual. Hanggang isang araw, nabagok ang ulo ko at nagka-amnesia. Joke lang po. Lols! D'yan naman tayo nage-enjoy di ba? Mga eksena ng naaaksidente, namamatay tapos nabubuhay ulit, namamatay tapos lumilipat sa kabilang drama show o kabilang channel, namamatay tapos buntis pala in real life. Maygad. Kaya ang buhay natin akala natin pang-MMK din! But that's fine, just give yourself some time to realize this, like how other people took time to learn more in life.
However, I hope that when you're ready, I want you to think differently. I want you to have a life that's more than OKAY.
You can start by searching for different kinds of media, perhaps like documentaries, biographies, late-night news ['wag po ang balita sa umaga at primetime dahil nakaka-drain lang ng energy 'yun], inspirational youtube videos, workout videos, free webinars about financial literacy or something, read self-development books, fiction or non-fiction [pero tigilan na ang pocketbooks pls, walang pinagkaiba 'yan sa drama sa TV], or any other materials that are anyway available and easily accessible online for free.
I urge you to search as much as you can, having this in mind that you have to know something about everything and everything about something for you to develop that skill of researching and learning new things. It's a skill that's very vital at this times. Moreover, only by learning new things, we can redesign our brains with new sequences, new patters, and new combinations. Why do we have to change our mind? I'll talk about that in a bit.
Lesson #2: TAKE YOUR TIME IN FIGURING OUT WHAT IT IS YOU REALLY WANT IN LIFE, BUT WHEN YOU'RE READY, MAKE SURE TO QUESTION AND EXAMINE YOUR OLD IDEAS, BELIEFS, IMPRESSIONS, AND HABITS, THEN BE READY TO HAVE AN AMAZING LIFE!
All of us probably know what we want, why we want it and how we can achieve it. Or do we?
Sa dami ng nabasa ko tungkol sa career growth, may mga common denominators talaga like for you to really get ahead, you should work as if you're the owner of the company. Kapag 'yun ang iniisip mo, you'll never be absent, you'll be more confident in handling difficult situations, you'll be more considerate to your customers, you'll be conscious of using company property and resources, you'll be more passionate in reading and studying about the products and services being offered, you'll think more creatively, generate more ideas, and plan more strategies to help increase the sales and keep the existing customers, etc.
Pero kahit anong aral ko at overtime ko, kahit ilang awards pa ang na-receive ko, 'di ako napo-promote! May mga time pa na mami-misunderstood ako ng ibang collegues at pagiisapan na pabibo. Lols! 😅😁 So, I always end up resigning after a while. Walang growth eh 😅
The point is, kahit ano pa ang skills natin, kahit ano pa ang handa nating isakripisyo para sa kumpanya, kahit busilak pa ang hangarin natin, at the end of the day, hindi tayo ang makikinabang ng lahat ng 'yun. Ang tanging pakinabang natin sa lahat ng pinasukan nating trabaho ay ang experience at syempre ang sahod. Tapos 'pag nagkamali ka pa o ginawan ng issue, sisante ka kahit gaano ka pa katagal sa kumpanya.
Maraming beses na sumagi sa isipan ko na baka hindi ito para sa akin. Nakailang career change na ako, nganga pa rin! Lols! I knew that I have to put up my own business and be my own boss sooner or later! I bet many of us are thinking the same thing, right? Owning a business is the answer! Or is it?
I started by accounting my expenses using a budgeting app that I downloaded for free. If I wanna get rich, then I need to know first where my money is going. I started using the app last October-ish of 2017. Try it for yourselves, I promise that you will be surprised at how you're spending your hard-earned money! Lols! Pramis 'yan! 😅😁
And also, I've read a lot of business related articles and books, followed Entrepreneur Philippines and other Facebook pages online. Then, I've made a handful of unfinished business plans and proposals. I tried different small businesses like selling RTW [Ready To Wear] jeans and shirts, home-service massage, I helped out in my mom's karinderia [it's not for me hehe], took driving lessons and registered to Uber, thought of going back to real estate, o kaya yung mga negosyo ko nung high school kagaya ng paggawa at pagbebenta ng peanut butter at paglalako ng fishball at tokneneng! Lols! 😅😁 Finally, I tried selling coin banks. Alam po ba ninyo yung "Ipon Shade Challenge"?
Lahat 'di nag-work! Lols! 😅😁 Kinausap ko na naman ang sarili ko. Ayun, naghanap ng mababasa. Lahat ng tanong ko nasagot ni Robert Kiyosaki. I took what I needed and threw what I didn't need at the moment. It's better than watching inspirational videos kuno of people getting rich because of luck! Nagawa natin magaral for 10-14 years, magagawa din natin ulit in 1-2 years. Tara, group study tayo kabayan! 😁
Lesson #3: READ "RICH DAD POOR DAD". Or subscribe to his YouTube Channel and watch his videos, like this one:
Later ko na lang naisip na baka kailangan ko ituloy kahit hindi mag-work sa umpisa kasi baka may nami-miss akong lessons along the way. I only pass through the idea-stage and proto-type kasi, kaya last March sinubukan ko na ituloy magbenta ng alkansya dito sa UAE. Lols! 😅😁
I was trying to solve a problem among OFWs which is saving money for the future. There's a need for the solution that I'm providing but why it's not working?! 😅
And that's when I realized that Filipinos are unknowing volunteer victims of capitalism. Hindi pa parte ng ating kultura ang pagtitipid, pagpaplano ng finances at pagi-invest. Nahawa na tayo sa consumerism ng kanluran dahil sa irresponsible advertising and marketing ng mga kumpanya sa Pinas. So, I got interested in reading articles about financial literacy. That's the start of my new found purpose. I may not have the resources, capital, knowledge, and wisdom of professional traders as of the moment but I sure am going to try because I know that our kabayans need help. Naka-move on na ako sa alkansya ko. 😅😁
We need to actively spread the awareness on how to be financially literate. Among the three most common paths to financial freedom to lead a life of abundance [namely Investing In Stocks, Real Estate, or Setting Up A Business], investing and/or trading in the stock market should be the first step since it's more liquid, which means you can put your investment in and out anytime and it doesn't require a huge amount of capital to start with. Besides, it's a good training ground to really commit one's self into studying, controlling his/her emotions, practicing patience, due diligence and discipline before putting up a business which requires a lot more. This is my reason for spending a lot of time reading ebooks, researching other resources online, editing pictures and videos, and finally sharing ideas here on my blog and on Facebook.
Lesson #4: FIND A REASON TO GET UP IN THE MORNING THAT IS BEYOND YOUR PERSONAL "WHYs". A LIFE THAT IS SHARED WITH OTHERS IS WAY MORE MEANINGFUL.
Do you still remember earlier, I said that we have to change our mind? This is the reason for that! We have to learn as much as we can to alter our mindset. Easier said than done. I've known "The Secret" since 2015 and THE POWER since 2016 but some of the things that I wanted to attract three years ago are just starting to manifest this year. Clearly, I'm not an expert in applying the principles of these ancient teachings.
However, I just found some tips last week that I think would be helpful for us to apply this knowledge.
Let me ask you, naniniwala ka ba na nakakaapekto sa iyong buhay ang mga bagay na palagi mong iniisip? I sure do.
If you do, did you consciously created a future in your mind this morning when you woke up?
Let me guess... you didn't. Same here. Why? Kasi hindi naman talaga tayo naniniwala dito sa kaibuturan ng ating puso. Mas naniniwala pa yata tayo sa aswang at sa tsismis ni aling nena. For us, it's just a bunch of bullshit like any other things in life that we have tried but never really worked out.
Kasi kung naniniwala talaga tayo na totoo ang sa isang bagay, walang araw na magmimintis tayo na gawin ito. Does this mean that our ENVIRONMENT CONTROL OUR THINKING or does OUR THINKING CONTROL OUR ENVIRONMENT?
Let me show you a picture.
Think of our daily routines, let's imagine that yours is like this: Gumising ka 2 hours bago ang login mo sa trabaho, bumangon ka sa exact same side ng kama/banig kagaya ng ginawa mo kahapon, pinatay mo ang alarm ng phone mo gamit ang mga daliri na ginamit mo sa pagpatay nito kahapon, nag-jebs ka kagaya ng lagi mong ginagawa araw-araw, naligo ka, nagsabon, shampoo at conditioner kagaya ng ginagawa mo palagi, nagayos ka at nagbihis with the same style or minsan may konting tweaks para maiba naman, sumakay sa parehas na byahe ng jeepney, bus or train going to work, nakita mo na naman yung masungit mong boss, maingay mong bff at cute mong crush, you do the exact same thing that you know how to do and memorized it so well na naging expert ka na, let's say kabisado mo na ang pagiging tech rep ng Uverse. Lols! Tapos magmamadali ka makauwi kasi aabutan ka ng traffic sa EDSA at baka di mo maabutan ang paborito mong teledrama, tapos magmamadali ka dahil wala kang data kaya kailangan mo ang Wi-Fi sa bahay para sa ka-chat mong friends, family members or office crush, tapos magmamadali kang maligo para matulog ulit, at magmamadali kang gawin lahat ng 'yon kinabukasan sa parehas na paraan at sa parehas na oras.
Here's the question: Did your brain change at all that day? - Of course, not.
Can we say that you were thinking the same thoughts, performing the same actions, that create the same experiences that produced the same emotions, but secretly expecting something to change in your life? - Probably, yes.
As you see the same people and go to the same places and do the same things, at the same time, it's the external ENVIRONMENT that's turning on different circuits in your brain, causing you to think equal to everything that you know. Habang ang iniisip mo ay ang iisang mga bagay na pamilyar at alam mo, ano sa tingin mo ang klase ng buhay na mabubuo at maa-attract mo? - The answer is, you'll create more of the same life.
95% of who we are, by the time we're 35 years old, is a set of memorized behaviors, a set of emotional reactions, beliefs, perceptions, attitudes that run like a computer program. So, 5% of our conscious mind begins to work against 95% of what we've memorized. Kaya kahit pinipilit natin na maging positive minsan kapag may problema, di natin maiwasan magisip ng negative. It's our mind and body in opposition.
Lesson #5: TO TRULY CHANGE IS TO THINK GREATER THAN YOUR ENVIRONMENT! THAT IS THE WAY TO HAVE AN AMAZING LIFE!
Every great person in history knew this, just listen to The Power and watch The Secret, they've enumerated some of the people who knew how to apply this knowledge.
Let this be the answer as well to some of our kabayans who asked me why I included some exercises in the trading journal template that I shared on my Facebook profile. Only through learning new things, meditating and exercising we can alter the circuits in our brain. Altering our brain can help us really believe beyond the things we consider to be impossible or downright bullshit.
We can learn new things in just a matter of minutes but tend to forget them after a few days, right? Lols! Meditating has been very difficult for me to do because I tend to overthink sometimes. I downloaded a couple of meditation apps before but they just didn't work out for me. I'm trying another app right now, so let's see. However, simple and basic exercises have been working for me since I worked at Fitness First before. That's why I included them in my journal.
One more tip that I've learned recently, is to use a bracelet with beads when stating or thinking of your positive affirmations in the morning. One declaration for every bead. Or use your rosary instead like how monks use theirs.
Once we have that ability to redesign our brain to fit the patterns that correspond to the results that we are aiming for, we can then create a future in our mind and believe that it can happen, or better yet, it's already happening.
Having said all of that, I believe that this is "MY WHY". It is a vision of a life committed to learning new lessons and sharing them with Kabayans. I still have a lot to learn and probably commit many more mistakes. I'm still clueless most of the time. After all, we're no adults, just wrinkled children, right? 😅 I now have 5 lessons to share, can you please help me learn more? Please! 😅😁
Magtulungan sana tayo mga kabayan. 😁
This is my why, what is yours?
Please find time to read our MANIFESTO: THE LEAGUE OF PINOY STOCK MARKET STUDENTS.
Para sa amin, hindi kailangan na maging boring at kumplikado ang pagaaral ng stock market investment at trading. Tara, group study tayo mga kabayan! Let's all INVESTINFUN!